Yet again the title speaks for itself. I find that amusing. I like how complete sentences go out the window when ever I write anything online. Perhaps its the fact they we are anonymous? Or maybe its just that we are lazy.
I also like the fact that I can disappear for months on end and come out of nowhere and just pick up where I left off. Its probably because I like to pretend that I have that kind of freedom in real life.

Thats right, I've all ready seen it and its only friday morning at like 2am. Also nothing tastes better then jack in the box tocos at 2 am. I care not what anyone says, they are delicious.

The Movie was awesome and though who know me know i wasn't into the first two so much. But this one was truely a master piece. More tomorrow when I am not falling asleep at the key board.

It never fails, I can go 6 months with out sneezing then at the end of the school year I get a horrible chest cold. I came home from work around 7 Saturday and by the time I went to bed I had fire in my throat and a faucet for a nose. And today I can barely talk my throat is so soar.

Damnet.

Thats right, thats what I've been drinking all night, and let me tell it tastes great.

When ever I drink I have this overwhelming need to bear my soul and let the those around me know how I fell at that moment, something I would never do on sober. I get emotional and all childish when I drink alone. ehhh perhaps I should stop doing that. I almost never do it, maybe once every 3 months.

I dont know, I grow weary of listening to myself wine about myslef. I wish I was as manly as all the greatest super heros.

Well I think I might be a closet Emo.

Lets see, I like and prefer the Dark.
I love movies that are evil and full of darkness with depressing music.
I like Panic at the Disco.(Thats Pretty Emo)
Ummm my room is decorated in Dragons.(not sure if thats Emo)
I love Dante's Inferno and any book about Hell.
The Gothic look... is hot.

I've spent the last three days listening to the nightmare before Christmas soundtrack. Thats definitely Emo. (Side not; I think Fall Out Boy should redo the entire soundtrack.)

I don't know, mayhaps I've just been in a dark mood for many a day now. I know not the reason for my depression though I know I grow weary of it. Actually I think its my grades, I got this large scholarship from UNR but I need to maintain a 3.75 or higher to receive it but it seems to be very difficult to do so at the moment. I failed a very crucial physics test, not because.I couldnt do the math but because I missed every concept question there and those are suppose to be the easy ones. ehhhh

Human sexuality is going ok I guesse, high Bs on both tests and I have only missed one posting but even with that I still only have an 84 in the class.

And Precalc well that seems to be the easy class. Most of it is just doing hw. ehh

Ehhhh Damnable Darkness...

Current Music: Panic At The Disco - This Is Halloween

So I've spent the last four days playing "Kingdom Hearts 2" and I finally beat it today. It took 48 hours to do it but I did it. There is just something about this series that makes me think in a pleasantly uncomfortable way.

I haven't played the first "Kingdom hearts" in a while but I remember the way I felt. Behind the facade of Disney characters lurks a rather adult themed game with well developed characters. Now that I have justified my love of Disney Final Fantasy cross overs....

The first one has this really dramatic music that fits the questions that the story asks. Its hard to put into words what I am thinking.

Both stories revolve around a young man trying to discover who he is, and answer these question about life. Yet it goes deeper then that. They talk about the darkness in us and how even the strongest of us can succumb to it.

Then their are these reports you can find in the game that are extremely philosophical. If it wasn't a Disney game you could read some of these reports out side the context of the game and they could potential have significant meaning. Of the little I have read of Friedrich Nietzsche, the Ansem Reports remind of his work so.

Ansem:
"Chaos affects not only this world, but many other worlds besides."
"All living things have hearts, and all hearts hold darkness deep within.
Worlds are no exception. If a world is a being, the heart it holds must be colossal
and the darkness at its core must be monstrous indeed. "


Friedrich Niezsche:

"And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you."
"He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster."

I no longer know where I wish to go with this so allow me to end on this note, Some of the greatest people I know denounce and belittle video games for having a lack of meaning, substance or intelligence, but meaning is where you find it. Subsistence is what you make of it. and intelligence is not always necessary.

I believe theres a point where you can become to intelligent, to inquisitive. Where you spend so much time pondering questions that it consumes you. That the darkness in ones heart consumes him.

"If the light of hope has been extinguished, I shall henceforth walk with darkness as a friend."
Ansem

All bow down before his highness, Lord Razzle Frazzle!

I desire to write things with deep meaning that illustrates a greater understanding of the who I am, what I stand for and my understanding of the universe, but I cant seem to bring myself to do it. I lack the gumption, the will, or maybe its just the courage.

Well I spent like 6 hours today rocking on guitar hero and finally something clicked between my head and hands that after many hours of game play has allowed me rock past medium and hard and straight to expert. My hand is extremely tired now but it was worth it. I was pulling off moves I didn't even know existed. It was Amazing.

Now I really need to get Guitar Hero 2 and wireless guitar to help advance my rockage.

A ninja is never a master of death until he is an observer of life. -Askaninja

I love askaninja, if you are a fan of ninjas you will love it too.

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